The Extra Point

ND-UCLA Pt. 1--The Beginning

This is about where I picked the game up. I did Zombiecon in Manhattan. Went out with a hundred people or two, and we put on zombie makeup and shambled around, got drunk and scared tourists and little children. My throat hurts from gravely moaning "BRRAAAIIINNNSSS!" too many times. It was basically an excuse to recycle last year's Halloween costume.

Ghostbuster.

The best and worst of Halloween costumes.

It's the best because:
1. Everyone recognizes and instantly loves you. Strangers shout "Ghostbusters" as you walk by them on the street. You enjoy minor fame.
2. If they play the Ghostbusters theme song at the party, you rule the dance floor for 4:03. Use that time wisely. Remember, girls like Venkman.
3. You make a "proton pack" from a bookbag and one of those pump spray pesticide holders. You fill the backpack with ice bought from a deli (while wearing zombie makeup, but no one says anything, cause this is New York City). You then pour in a bottle of vodka. Your call how big that bottle is. You throw six tall boys of Bud in there. Then you throw some lemonade mix on top for flavor. You get really drunk on your own cool-aid, and you can dispense drinks to friends and hot chicks and the bouncer is none the wiser. This also makes it the worst costume.

On your back you carry around a bomb. This bomb will eventually explode, causing you to fall down, embarass yourself, and possibly puke over the side of your bed. When you carry around the party's biggest mixed drink in your backpack, with the ability to drink it all night, you inevitably get way, way too drunk. It takes a great, great man to be able to pull off the Ghostbuster cotume.

So if someone comes up to you and says, hey, let's be Ghostbusters for Halloween. Don't do it.

Here's a pic of me, dressed as a Zombie Ghostbuster, riding a 6 passenger bike through times square.

It was a crazy day, and I missed most of the ND game, but hey, that's what tivos are for. And anything that gets me to take a photo like this next one, I'm in support of. The Ghostbuster costume was almost too much.

... I mean I'm no, I can't... I'm a little man, I'm a little man, he's... he's a great man.

ND-UCLA Pt. 2--Giving the Ball to the Enemy

How many times can you run a QB sneak in one game before the opponent will stop you?

ND-UCLA Pt. 3--The Defense

Wow, good defense. When I first heard about the whole "Mute quarterback" thing, I thought the defense would have an easy game. I mean, c'mon, a Muteback leading an offense, unable to communicate through normal vocal facilities. Left to suffer, without words. Ow, so sad and deep, it's like some crappy teenage romance novel, and I could never respect an offense run by a romance novel. But hey, the kid could throw. So why not let him go for the first down? Haven't people learned yet? Get conservative against Charlie and you will lose. And by the way, how demeaning must that be to the third string quarterback. "Yeah, we know the other guy can't talk, but c'mon, how well can you really throw?

ND-UCLA Pt. 4--The Comeback

This is the part that made people jump around yell. I was standing at the bar of the Continental ( I typed Continental NYC into google and got this result--this is so damn hilarious, I'm just beginning to have fun with this one), and two Purdue fans, who were bitching about how much they hate Notre Dame, were jumping up and down with me and hugging after the Samrdzija TD. My hands were shaking. Can I say again how nice it is to be able to run a 2-minute drive down the field, something that was lacking from ND football for ten years. Damn it's nice to see it back again.

ND-UCLA Pt. 5--The aftermath

People crying, losing their shit, and having their synapses flooded with serotonin until their heads explode in joy.

Ok, yesterday was supposed to be the unlucky day, right?

Wow, I'm glad Notre Dame's not playing, or Brady would undoubtedly be carried off in a stretcher due to some freak injury. Troy Smith, lookout. Speaking of Heisman candidates, Smith, Quinn, and Wolfe will be partying tonight.

I think Bob Stoops must have some terrible Karmic debt, or have used a Monkey's Paw or something, how do you lose your starting QB and RB in the same year? There's no way my current Dynasty season on NCAA 07 will look anything like reality now. But my video game season diverged from reality immediately after kickoff of the ND-Michigan game.

ND-Stanford Pt. 1

We're trying a little different format this week. Instead of my ugly mug breaking down the video, I'm gonna try something other bloggers do--this typing thing. So the breakdown will be laid out in print for all to see and ridicule, and then ultimately be corrected. It was just taking too long to cut up all the video for such a long TD drive.

So here we are, a perfect example of the Charlie Weis "Death by a Thousand Cuts" offense. There's two minutes before the half, and like a bad rerun... actually no, this is a great rerun. Like that episode of Saved by the Bell where Jesse sang "I'm So Excited" and got real emotional because of her drugs and that pesky eating disorder. That shit was hilarious. If you ever get a chance to see that episode while actually on drugs, you will laugh your ass off, but in a nostalgic sort of way. Unless you were born after 1985, in which case you will probably not know what I'm talking about. But feel free to laugh about it now. Digression! So like a good rerun, just like last year the Irish march down the field before time expires and throw a big 7 on the board against Stanford. Those guys must hate that.

We pick it up a couple plays in after Darius has run for a 1st down. The Tree has a hard time on this drive getting pressure on Quinn, but that's mostly because they don't like blitzing. However, on this play, they send a corner and a LB, and they're picked up pretty well, but man does Quinn react here to the light pressure. Just the sight of a blitzer makes him go all wobbly legged like he got hit with a tranq dart. Charlie goes after the linebackers here with some crossing routes, and they don't have a chance.

ND-Stanford Pt. 2

So the Tree drop 8 and only send 3 after Quinn. Don't they realize that they're playing to his strength! Haven't they watched the tape! The linebacker and the DB are confused by crossing receivers, and it looks like the linebacker stutters for a second on the replay. He just wants to the help the Shark out a little. Give him some room. Selachimorpha helps himself to a first down. See, this is an educational blog. For all you Nobel prize fans out there, or the crowd at a Cal game. Ignore the audio on the clip as Haden keeps rambling something about YAC yards. Apparently the announcers found that pronouncing the word YAC over and over to be really funny. They're like the PG version of Beavis and Butthead. Yeah, it was a really exhilarating game.

ND-Stanford Pt. 3

You see, this is the problem I have with the tv coverage of the ND games. I really would like to talk about something on this play, but I can't. As soon as the ball is snapped, the cameraman zooms in, and you can't even tell what's going on ten yards away. But if you're a fan of Offensive Line play, and I know you are, you get to watch two double teams and near hold!

Charlie just continues to attack the middle, patiently, meticulously marching down the field. You just got the feeling he could have done it all day. That's a great feeling to have on a two minute drive. He'll keep running it until you can beat it. Or until the game is in hand. He's not an insane lunatic like Steve Spurrier. Spurrier looks more and more like a cartoon every day.

ND-Stanford Pt. 4

In the interests of balance, Charlie throws in a draw. He picks up a safe first down. Weis seems more concerned with chugging ahead and getting first downs than with the clock. As he should be, because up to this point the Irish had only scored 7 points in the half. The run blocking looks pretty good, but the LB's are skittish and freaked out about the pass at this point, and there's only 6 guys in the box. Helps that they don't have a D-Line like Michigan too.